He is such a slut. More and more my type.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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