Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize