i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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