their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Randomize
