How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
