he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Randomize
