You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Randomize
