soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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