After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
