Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Randomize
