so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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