its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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