i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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