it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
