Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
