So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
