My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Randomize
