Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
