How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
