That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Randomize
