No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
