I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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