idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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