Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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