and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
foreskin is a definite game changer
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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