we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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