Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
