I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Randomize
