Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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