seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize