I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize