a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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