so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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