So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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