you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
