Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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