The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize