What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
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