This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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