I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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