What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Randomize
