Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
