Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
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