you turned your livingroom into a bong?
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Randomize
