You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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