I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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