meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
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