gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize