me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
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