Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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