Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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